Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I’ve been lax, I’ve been lazy, at least as far as this blog is concerned.

Is it still a blog?

I don’t think it is anymore. I don’t post 5 or 10 times a day, with a list of what I had for lunch and what I’m having for dinner or what I think about EVERYTHING!

My scope has narrowed significantly. I write when I feel like it, I write when I have the time. I try to write when I have something unique to say.

Today, I don’t have anything unique to say, so perhaps I should just tell you what I had for lunch. Chicken Caesar salad with goat’s cheese and aubergine bread, with chillies. Yummmm.

It was from Firezza pizza. Google it, maybe you live near a branch and can have exactly the same thing in 30 minutes or less delivered to your door. Yummm for you too.

For the last month or so I’ve had a lot of work on, which has been cutting into my hippy time quite a bit. I’ve actually been working really hard, like a dog.

No, I mean it, I’ve actually been working like a dog; herding sheep during the day and chasing an electric rabbit around a track at night. Oh and on the weekend, I’ve been taking blind people out for long walks and trips to the shop.

Ok, enough of the fucking dog jokes, we get it!

That’s the thing with my life, when I’m busy working, I don’t have time for anything else; not even you my beloved and sorely neglected hippyfans.

The other thing that has been distracting me away from all things hippy has been my myopic quest for a new(ish) car. I always having trouble spending money and it seems that the size of my problems is directly in proportion to the amount of money I’m trying to spend.

A car is the most expensive thing you own, after your house and if you rent, it’s the most expensive! The forces of the universe were indeed aligned to fuck this hippy but good!

For starters, all car dealers lie as easily as I draw breath and my lungs are good and clear, which is surprising considering the amount of smoke they process.

My needs were very specific; this time I knew the exact make and model of my intended wheels.

And then there were my own problems, with my budget, which increased a fair bit after doing some research, It was justified as the real value for money bargains were just outside my original price range.

The best deals I found were “slightly used” new cars, directly from the dealer. I saved around 4 grand off the cost of a brand new one, by going for a model that had 1,600 miles on it, all put there by the manufacturer. In other words, an employee drove it for a while, or it was a demo model.

It came with the remainder of the warranty as well; a respectable 28 months from the original 3 years. It will hold it’s value longer as too.

It’s in perfect shape and if I told you it was brand new, you wouldn’t argue with me. I think I got a great deal!

The car I went for is another Toyota Yaris. I loved my first one, so why mess around with a good thing? It’s a 2006 model, a 3-door, T3, 1.3 if that means anything to you. Oh and it’s blue. I adore it already!

Besides being really shiny, it is incredibly well designed, slightly bigger and more ergonomic than my previous one and the larger engine makes a big difference. It’s in the same insurance and road tax band, the emissions are low and the petrol mileage is high. What’s not to love?

It took me over 4 weeks to locate, negotiate and buy this car. I looked at over a dozen and nearly bought at least 3 of them, before the salesman said something to put me off, or I discovered some concealed problem.

Life has a way of working everything out for the best, even if you can’t see it at the time. The long, arduous route I followed to get this particular car is just what it took, because in the end, I got the right car.

Now that I’ve sorted the car, I can move down to the next big thing on my list of big things to do. Lucky me.

I’ll try to come back more often, but I always say that; empty words and meaningless promises. And they’re worth exactly the price of the paper this page is printed on.

Oh, right.

Listen: Kurt Vonnegut is my favourite author.

Perhaps “was” would be more appropriate as one of the best writers of the 20th century passed away in New York overnight and I feel like I’m mourning a close relative.

If I’m honest, and I always am, I’d say I feel like I’m mourning my spiritual father.

I know that sounds silly, but Kurt Vonnegut has been a major influence on the way I think, the way I write and just overall the person that I am today.

Kurt Vonnegut was the first author who challenged me and my ideas about what modern writing could aspire to be. He was a literary genius of the highest order and his departure from the planet is a loss for us all.

If you haven’t read any Vonnegut, then I implore you to seek out his work immediately. If I could, I would buy you all his complete collection and then come to your house personally and read all of it out loud to you!

Yes, his writing is that fucking good!

The first Vonnegut book I read was “Slaughterhouse Five” which is the story of Billy Pilgrim, a man unstuck in time. This is how it starts:

“Listen: Billy Pilgrim has come unstuck in time.”

And he was.

The story flits around like a hummingbird on acid, bouncing between the various parts of Billy’s life, from his youth to his old age with random stops in between. OK, maybe not that random; as the book does concentrate upon two key events in Billy’s life.

Billy’s experiences as a POW in Dresden during World War II mirror the author’s; both of them spent the firebombing of Dresden hunkered down in the basement of slaughterhouse number five, hence the title. Vonnegut was deeply affected by his time as a prisoner and as you read his semi-fictional account, you will see what I mean.

The book was published in 1969 at the height of the Vietnam War. Here in 2007, at the height of the Iraq war, his words resonate even more and take on a deeper significance.

Billy also spends time as a different type of prisoner; he is the star attraction at a zoo on the planet Tralfamadore. He’s not alone as if memory serves, he is meant to mate with a female human porn star. I can’t say for sure if this also mirror’s Mr. Vonnegut’s real life, but if there was one human worthy of capture and display by an alien race, it is certainly Kurt.

I was 12 years old when I first read “Slaughterhouse Five” and it’s impact on me, even at that age, was immense. This wasn’t the sort of literature I was given to read at school, though it certainly should have been!

Actually, I did do a school report on the book, but not before my parents had to provide signed consent for me to do so. His books were considered quite controversial at the time. And I’m sad to say, that is even truer today. Vonnegut’s books are banned in many school libraries for their secular humanist overtones.

Fuck you, censors! You all suck!

Vonnegut always told the truth and he always questioned authority. He marvelled at the utter pointlessness of existence, the limitless expanse of human greed and stupidity and the bleak end that awaits us all. His writing puts all of this far more eloquently than I ever could, but I’ve felt a deep affinity for his work. I don’t think you could measure the influence he has had on me if you tried.

I was at work last night, when I heard the news. I genuinely had trouble holding back the tears. I feel like I’ve lost a member of my family, even though I’d never met the man.

That’s what good writing is like; I felt like I knew him. More than that, I’ve often felt he was my spiritual father, which I know is dumb thing to say, as well as an insult to my own (dearly departed) real father and Mr. Vonnegut’s real children. Actually, I hope his children are not offended and they welcome their spiritual stepbrother with open metaphorical arms.

I wouldn’t (pretend to) be a writer today if it weren’t for the impact Kurt Vonnegut has had on me. I hope that when you read this very blog, you can sense his presence guiding my words.

I’ll say it again, because it merits repeating: If you have not ever read anything by Kurt Vonnegut then please, I am urging you to do so as soon as you can. The man understood the human condition better than most and reading his work will make you a better person. It will free your mind; at least I think it will, because it freed mine.

I’m sorry I can’t do more justice to the man, his writing and his life, but I’m just a lowly blogger, toiling in relative obscurity. As much as I know I should leave it to his contemporaries, such as Norman Mailer and Gore Vidal, who will eulogise him in a manner more deserving, I felt I had to add my voice to the many who are mourning this true American original.

I’ll miss you, Kurt. Thank you. Thank you very much.

And so it goes. And so did he.