The northlondonhippy

Archive for October 18th, 2007

Wel­come to the last 24 hours with this hippy.

No, this isn’t my iMac review. As if I had time to fin­ish that! It will come when its ready.

It’s just gone 10am, north Lon­don time and I’ve now been awake con­tin­u­ously for 24 fun-filled hours. I also worked last night, which only enhances the fun and delir­ium of skip­ping sleep.

I’ve done this with­out stim­u­lants, except for 3 cups of cof­fee in that time. I had one around the time I woke up yes­ter­day, another one around 8pm, before I departed my lair and my third and final cup at mid­night. I haven’t taken any speed, or coke or any other sim­i­lar substance.

What’s even more amaz­ing is I do this to myself once or twice a week because of my erratic, noc­tur­nal exis­tence. Hey ho.

When I woke up yes­ter­day, I went through my nor­mal rou­tine, which along with the cof­fee, includes sev­eral cig­a­rettes and a con­sid­er­able amount of time parked in front of my com­puter. After a quick glance at my emails, which I’ve still mostly yet to respond to, I read most of the UK’s news­pa­pers online as well as sev­eral other news and cur­rent affairs sites. This hippy likes to know what’s going down in the world and around the cor­ner before I’ve even had a shower.

I also refresh my RSS reader, which is full of mainly gad­gety blogs and Apple related sites, so I can stay up to date with all the cool new toys they want me to buy.

They want me to buy every­thing. Fear not, I don’t. I only buy what I need, it’s just I need every­thing. Like a lot­tery win, I could really do with a lot­tery win. If you’ve got a spare win­ning ticket that’s just going beg­ging, why not punt it in my gen­eral direction.

Bet­ter yet, if you’re one of those super rich moth­er­fuck­ers, why don’t you just send me a mil­lion or two. You could become my patron or my spon­sor. Shit for a cou­ple of mil­lion quid, you can be my sugar-daddy or sugar-mummy and I wouldn’t care which.

No, seri­ously, hear me out. Say you were mega-rich and part­ing with a cou­ple of mil­lion quid wouldn’t put a dent in your port­fo­lio and you wouldn’t even miss it. You really could just give it to me.

We could hold a press con­fer­ence, where I reveal my iden­tity as the northlon­don­hippy and you reveal a large gift for yours truly. Peo­ple would love us both! We’d be heroes! Just for one day!

Maybe not.

Where was I? Oh yeah, what I read online in the morn­ing. Loads.

I also have the tele­vi­sion on, at that time of the day most defin­i­tively on a 24 hour tv news chan­nel. It’s on in the back­ground, I’m not star­ing at the screen because it rests directly behind me. The telly and the iMac are in oppo­site cor­ners of the room.

I sip my cof­fee, I take deep, sat­is­fy­ing drags from my first smoke of the day and I surf the web for an hour or so. I also start any down­loads I need that day. Yes­ter­day it was a pro­gramme called “Dam­ages”, which I have decided is pretty shit-fucking hot. There’s one more episode left for me next week and I am really look­ing for­ward to it! It’s on in the states right now and I think I read it was bought over here by a ter­res­trial broad­caster for trans­mis­sion next year.

After screen­ing “Dam­ages”, I threw on some clothes and ran a few errands locally. Noth­ing excit­ing, unless you think col­lect­ing dry clean­ing is a thrill.

Have I just gone down in your esti­ma­tion because I men­tioned “dry clean­ing”? Not just any dry clean­ing, but my own? Is my hippy hat slipping?

Nah! I’m still cool, I’m chilly, brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr…

After all that I came home, got comfy and had my first thing of the day. By thing, of course I mean spliff. Mmm­m­mmm. By then, Mrs. H was around and we’ve had a DVD of “Casino Royale” for a cou­ple of weeks that really needed view­ing. So that’s what we did; we watched a blonde James Bond kick some seri­ous bad-guy ass!

After the film, it was quite late in the after­noon, so I tried briefly to catch some zzzz’s, but sleep was elu­sive and my dark and dan­ger­ous thoughts con­tin­ued to race through my head.

We had my favourite Malaysian take­away for din­ner, before I had to go, though I’ve got a newly dis­cov­ered Japan­ese restau­rant nearby that’s becom­ing a very close second.

Work was fine, just a bog stan­dard night with noth­ing much of merit to report. And if there was some­thing of merit, I wouldn’t men­tion it here. I keep my job well out of this site!

After work, I pro­vided a lift home for a friend of mine. We got away a bit later than we’d hoped, which meant the traf­fic was heav­ier than I would have pre­ferred. It took me ages to drop my mate off and even longer to get to the supermarket.

Yep, awake 22 hours and I did what any nor­mal, sen­si­ble, sane moth­er­fucker would do…my weekly shop!

I’ll spare you the details of the that, though if you are really des­per­ate, I could scan in my till receipt and email it to you as a JPEG. Then you could buy the same crap I buy. It would be just like you were liv­ing my life, only with­out all the mind­less angst and depres­sion over the futil­ity of existence…unless of course, you could bring a lit­tle bit of your own inse­cu­ri­ties and neu­ro­sis to the table!

After the shop­ping, there was the return trip home and then the cer­e­mo­nial unpack­ing of the car and trans­fer­ring of the pur­chases back inside my lair.

You would think this would be an easy task to accom­plish, but not in my world. For starters, there was no park­ing any­where near my front door. Nice. I had to dou­ble park, with my flash­ers a-flashing.

But could I unpack my car straight away? Of course not, because first I had to go inside and lock the kit­tens in the liv­ing room. They have an unhealthy inter­est in my front door and the last thing I’m going to let them do is escape to go play in the rush hour traf­fic, so they had to be secured before I could hold the front door open long enough to move every­thing inside.

Once the lit­tle kit­tens were safe, I then emp­tied the car, 4 bags of gen­eral shop­ping and 2 large bags of cat lit­ter. Don’t envy me for my glam­orous media lifestyle, envy me because as soon as I was fin­ished unloading/transferring/unpacking/storing every­thing and then prop­erly park­ing my car, I got out of my work clothes and rolled myself a tasty spliff of Organic Pur­ple Kush, which is one of the strongest weeds I’ve ever had. Great taste, seri­ous couch lock and zero% psy­chosis. Nine out of ten hip­pies, if given a choice, will always choose OPK.

And I know some of you really cool peo­ple out there in internet-land know exactly what I’m talk­ing about. Pre­cisely, even.

Which brings me right up to the present moment, OPK still going strong and my down­load of episode 4 of the new “Bionic Woman” com­pleted and ready for me to watch.

It’s got “Zoe off Eas­t­en­ders” in it, though she has an Amer­i­can accent and never says “innit”.

I’ll be back tomor­row for day 5 of “100 posts in 100 days”. The ques­tion is…will you be return­ing too?

Don’t tell me! I want it to be a surprise!